Never Tell Your Wife She’s “Wrong” And You’re “Right”!

Money issues break up over half of today’s couples, and most of these quarrels were caused by one person not listening to the other. Most of the time it’s the guy’s fault (even when it’s not his fault, it seems)!

This “lack” of communication occurs when one spouse spends money the other one has saved for something else (ex. a new 4-wheeler instead of a family vacation) or when one (read: usually the guy) reaches an important financial decision without the other. Misunderstanding happens when the couple is afraid to enter into a real financial discussion. The following should make those bouts go much smoother, and help you take each other “till death do you part”:

For guys: There is no “right vs. wrong” in making financial decisions — stop being pig-headed. This is not a sign of status or the time for ego (make these idiots wait outside). Don’t get defensive when your wife questions your decisions or situations — this will only lead to unnecessary fights and misunderstandings. Note: your wife is grateful for what you do and she does trust you to make correct financial decisions. Keep this in mind or suffer the consequences!

For gals: Don’t confuse your husband with stuff he does not fully understand (we’re easily confused). This will lead to him getting upset over you not saying directly what it is you want and why. So how do we solve or avoid these problems, you ask? Well, first you must also leave your ego out of the fight, and start from there. Note: you don’t know everything and neither does he. Unless you married a know-it-all (in this case: you’re screwed). I’m just joking — everyone can do this!

For both: Whoever’s more versed in a financial topic should be the one to patiently explain to the other what they know. If neither of you know what you’re talking about, you should both SHUT UP and go crack open a book. Also, you shouldn’t be embarrassed or ashamed of not knowing something — it’s smarter to plead ignorance. Note: If you can’t explain a topic to a child, you don’t know enough about it to argue on its behalf. Hit up the library — it might save your marriage!

Extra tips: 1) Emotions and communication don’t mix. 2) Being considerate will pay off in spades. 3) Ask questions if you don’t fully understand a financial situation or decision. 4) A lack of understanding will lead to future confrontations. Ok, I’m getting off my soapbox now!

When it comes to life, we all make plenty of mistakes and we all have many things to learn. Don’t let your pride or ego get in the way of the good life, or let the subject of money become a pink elephant in your relationship. Talk with your spouse in the same kind of patient and respectful way that you use with your boss and your conversations about finances will go much smoother. Guys, remember the title of this article, and you should be able to grow old with that special person you couldn’t see yourself without.

P.S. In today’s language, guy is now used for both genders!