Mail In Rebates Only Sound Good On Paper!

I absolutely abhor mail in rebates … more correctly, I loathe them!

My own consumer experience with mail in rebates has been entirely negative in nature, to the point that I will refuse to buy any product with a mail in rebate. This is period, the end of story, no further discussion necessary (unless you want to hear me say “NO” a few more times). Please, let me tell you why …

The entirely bureaucratic, very limited window, super-technical processing system itself is a massive fraud thought up by some not-so-nice marketing jerks (in not-so-nice Manhattan). From the top to the bottom, it was solely created, designed, and calibrated for the sole purpose of denying customer’s rebates — all the while giving the appearance that it is merely a processing step that the consumer must have missed along the way. To put it more dramatically (not that I need it, right? Too much coffee today, forgive me) rebates are a nasty cancer on the retail sales process.

To those companies who offer these rip-off mail in rebates:

Why not actually sell the product for the negotiated price? Why create another level of transactional costs for consumers to obtain the negotiated price? What possible purpose can this idiotic process be other than to generate a sales price higher than that agreed upon amount? This is a scam, plain and simple, and I’m calling you out on it now!

The only reason you do it is because, statistically speaking, a very large percentage of people purchasing your product will, for one reason or another, fail to get their rebate (you and I both know this). You rely on our stupidity, forgetfulness, laziness and inability to follow through with our rebate process in order to wring even more money out of our pockets, right?

The bottom line is pretty simple: The negotiated price should always be what you actually pay — without any additional administrative headaches, and without any further transaction costs. Anything that interferes with a “Buyer/ Seller’s” price agreement is going to be problematic (oh you know this? Go figure!). Maybe if enough consumers boycott these rebated products, you’ll start getting a clue!

My friend, companies love trying to get you to make a purchase based upon a mail in rebate discount, because they know (and count on the fact) that most people will tear out all their hair long before they summon the patience and sanity needed to gather and complete all of the necessary paperwork. And, even if you do manage to fill it all out and send in your rebate form, companies can (and usually do) deny your rebate pretty easily, either by some dreamed-up technicality or by their own incompetence. Even if you do get your rebate check (thank God for miracles, right?) think of the interest that the company has made off of your money by drawing out the process and frustrating you as long as they possibly can.

The only reason that mail in rebates exist is because, statistically speaking, a large percentage of people purchasing a product will, for one reason or another, fail to get their rebate (some circles say over 80% go unaccounted for). These companies are literally tricking us into buying their “got to have now” products, even though they know this same merchandise have been sitting on their shelves for well over a year now!

You may now be thinking to yourself that you are one of the few who always fills out the rebate forms correctly and always gets your rebate check back. If so, you know what? I thought I was too, until I sat back and tried to remember my history with them: like that one time that I shopped on the day the rebate expired, without realizing it. Or that one time that I lost the rebate receipt. Oh yeah, and that one time that I threw the box out before cutting out the UPC. Oh, and that one time I bought a gift, and then realized afterwards how cheap I’d look giving a gift with the UPC cut out. Oh, and that …. Ok, wait… I guess I am one of those people. I bet you are too, if you really think about it.

In conclusion, the next time you’re tempted to take a company up on their mail in rebate “offer” please, remember this first: before you buy a certain product based on the mail-in-rebate it offers, think real long and hard about what that company’s executives must think of you, as their customer, and then seriously try and decide if you still want to do business with them (with this new form of reasoning you’ll probably just say “no” now. Good for you!).

Look, you guys are all savvy (I know this because you read our well-researched articles) so I don’t think there’s really a need for me to remind you of the following (which is exactly why I am doing it): don’t ever, I mean ever, factor a mail in rebate into your purchasing equation: nine times out of ten, rebates are waste of time and money (read: scams). Remember: it is not a sale, it is a marketing ploy!