I Rent Out One Side Of My Mind!

Let me introduce you to my well-heeled tenant, William Burnthru Cash.

No, he’s not related to Johnny — he is my alter ego, and he spends way too much money. Let me give you an example: the other day my Suunto™ watch broke, and I said to myself, “So what, I have a bunch of watches that can tell me the time.” If you never heard of this brand of watches, perhaps you should get out more. No really, these watches are designed to give you valuable information when you’re deep in the woods. Most of the times, I just use it to look cool. It’s a gadget, what can I say?

Anyways, this little jerk tells me, “But none of your other watches have these same features (altimeter, barometer, compass, etc.) Let’s go buy a new one!” I told you, he loves to spend! Ok, he did have a valid point, but right now I can’t afford to blow any extra money on something I really don’t need. He really shouldn’t start his sentences with a conjunction, however. It’s bad grammar!

Will wanted a new watch, and since he’s paying rental space in my brain, I am forced to let him have his way sometimes. So I head off to my second favorite store, Bass Pro Shop (My #1: Cabela’s) and a half hour later I’m in their watch section. Up pops a good looking young lady, who has probably never been in the forest her whole life! She walks me through the different models, while comparing their features, and eventually I pick a few out that I liked. The cheapest one by a long shot was $250.00. Gadzooks! I told her I’d have to think about it, and walked out with two $5.99 t-shirts that showed I have at least been there, and that I love fishing. Which I do!

Back at home I decided to search the online vendors, to see if I couldn’t beat the high store prices. Maybe there wouldn’t be any cute women helping me out, but I am getting married soon anyways! I don’t need the headache (LOL). The best I could find was an older model for $189 (plus $10 shipping and handling). This was still too much, but Will kept breathing down my neck (he could be a real pain in the …). So what did I eventually do, you ask?

I hit up the eBay, and bid a total of $34 on a nice Casio ™ watch the seller claimed was in great condition. It even looked much cooler than my old “unreliable” (which, by the way, is sitting in a dark kitchen cabinet). There were a ton of pictures, and the ad went into a lot of details, which is what I like to see. It came with the original manual, and it never needed batteries (it was a solar watch). After a few days of waiting around to see if I was this winner, I was ecstatic when I found out that I was!

Right now, I’m enjoying an early morning break from a kayak ride I’m taking on the canal behind my place. As I look down at my watch, I notice the following: I have been paddling for 57 minutes, 48 seconds; I’m heading 49° NNW; my altitude is between 0-10 feet above sea level and its 79 degrees out. More importantly, Will is sitting there with his mouth shut and he really seems content. And with all the dough I saved on this great looking watch, so am I!

Note: I know that my last sentence started with a conjunction, but what can I say — Will is growing on me? Now if I could only make him save more!