A Fantastic Story That Won’t Cost You A Thing!

Free.

It’s the word I so love to hear, see, smell, taste and feel! I’m cheap, I get it … it’s not my fault though, as it might be in my blood (I hear all the jokes you guys throw at us Pennsylvania Dutch people. Yes, sometimes I do go “Dutch” [as you spendthrifts like to call it] when I go out to eat, and yes, I truly believe that a penny saved is a penny earned. Got a problem with that? LOL). This word, free, has a bunch of different meanings but the versions I like the most are these two: 1) Costing nothing; gratuitous: a free meal, and 2) Without charge.

Whenever I hear this word, I go “Woo Hoo” inside my brain! When I run across a deal that uses this awesome word, and I actually get to have something for nothing (which would be appealing to a lot of people) or am offered something with no strings attached (which most people are cautiously looking out for) I’ll get a huge smile on my face, float in the air a little bit, and my heartbeat starts picking up drastically. This is what a good, free deal does for me!

Who doesn’t like free stuff? Who doesn’t feel ripped off when they see their “free” deal has hidden fees or huge shipping charges? The worst is when you get down to the bottom of a “free” advertisement and there are some fine-printed strings attached. To me, that hidden agenda crap is not really free (far from it actually) and it seriously puts a bad taste in my mouth (enough so that I won’t even attempt to buy the product, because I now know that this company started off our agreement with lies). If you feel the same, then let me hear you shout it out! Wow, that was loud … I think you deserve a little story for that one (free of charge, of course) …

So, a couple of months ago, I was looking around for a cruiser bike to take down to the beach with me (instead of getting all that sand in the delicate parts of my pricier high-end mountain bike) so I placed a few calls to some people getting rid of theirs on Craigslist! One guy, I found out, was only asking $150 at the time, but after going to check it out I thought at the time that I could do better. To make a long story short: I wound up picking up one for ten bucks at a yard sale. Eventually, however, I found out the hard way that you get what you pay for, and this crappy ass bike fell apart in about two weeks of riding (first the inner tubes popped, then the seat post broke, and the list goes on and on). So last week I gave it to a homeless man who said he could fix it (I did something nice for my $10, I suppose).

So guess what happened to me yesterday … that first dude called me to ask if I still wanted his bike! I said, “Yes, of course,” but didn’t say it too enthusiastically (I still thought $150 was too much for something that was going to get beat up) and then I started going into excuse mode: “Yeah man, sorry I’ve been pretty busy around here (lie on my part) blah, blah, blah, I’ve been meaning to call you (note: I haven’t) and on and on and on!” Crap, I was really digging a hole for myself! After I blew out my silly s#@tstorm, he said to me (calmly, I might add here), “Don’t worry about it Pete (he even remembered my name. Now I feel bad, because I forgot his) no one else was interested in the damned thing, so I was going to give it to Goodwill, but then I found your number again on my phone! So if you want it, you can come pick it up for free”. Did he just say free? Yea, I think I heard a FREE thrown in there at the end!!! Holy moly … WOOO HOOO!!!!

I just picked my new bike up an hour ago, and it’s gorgeous (the M.S.R.P. on this thing was $1,100 when new)! God … I really love that sweet word. Did I ever tell you that?